Hey guys I know it’s been a while I published, I’m sorry. Blame it on lack of inspiration. But I’m back and I just want to write from a personal angle today. Being the other woman.
Yah…. Basically been the other woman in this case means being with a married man, not someone in a dating stage, or even engAged stage, nope! The married stage. I exclude the other ones course well, they haven’t gone in front of a court or an Altar to make that union official, so basically, a man is single till he is married, same goes for the ladies (my theory).
This I would like to believe happens to almost lady at one point in her life, married men clamoring for her attention, wanting to keep her as either a mistress or something, but basically a side piece right? Yah! Ok let’s go on….. I have always regarded myself as a lady who would never be ‘the other woman’ not only for the fear of the main woman but for the fear of Karma. Of course I know that one doesn’t always get what they deserve but it’s good to have that ‘I didn’t do it to some lady, therefore it won’t be done to me’ mindset and knowledge right? So with this mindset I stayed away from married men, made a conscious decision to run away from them, never needing any favors from them so as not to sprout that opportunity for them to as for personal favors in return. I spend like thirty minutes with a guy and immediately ask if he’s married just for caution. I found myself sometimes in a relationship only to find out dudes were married, so I find ways to get out of it, hard as it is cause feelings are involved already.
So let me just say that most men don’t make it easy, they lie about their marital status just to give you that fake feeling of ownership, and it’s hard for women to tell married men from the single ones.
So recently I met a guy, my kind of guy, wonderful radio voice, speaks great English ( one of my peeves are guys who speak wrong English with no sexy voice at all), so he’s tall, dark, and you know my perfect chocolate man, we met, spoke over the phone several times , (by the way I asked him, if he was married, you already know his answer) so he comes to my place of work and of course colleagues are ooooohing and aaahhhing at what great catch, by the way he comes and we just sit in his car, and so they haven’t seen him, just his car. Three weeks later I asked bluntly “Ayo(I’ll call him Ayo here) please tell me the truth, are you married? And he goes “what do you think” so I reply “you look married with kids, they might not be with you, maybe they are all not in Nigeria” and dude says “well sweetheart you are right except for the part of them not being here, they are all here with me” well you can imagine how I felt, if you can’t, well let’s just say I wasn’t exactly Ina right frame of mind anymore, so after asking him several times why he lied in the first place. He told me point blank “if I had said yes would you have given me the chance to know you” let’s leave my family out, and focus on us.
So I tried my best to stay away from him for say two weeks, but I had to see him, touch him, and hear his voice so after a while i gave in. I wouldn’t say I’m in love with this guy, but I would say hearing from him brightens my day, I still don’t consider myself his mistress or side piece. Maybe he’s a distraction from my confused love life, I have no idea.
I have heard many stories of women who get stuck in the situation and fall so hard, spending most of their youth with other women’s husband and realizing too late what they’ve done. Also heard of women that had their fun for just that bit and then cut off (hopefully that’s my case)
Please comment on your opinions, like share and follow my blog. Thanks for read.
I have also been the other woman (i’ve even written a post on it) and despite never wanting to be one of those women. But as you said, so many men lie about their status that often I would find out once I was already dating/them attracted to them.
Hope your situation works out OK!
Thanks, it’s funny how this actually happens to many women!
It’s more than you think isn’t it?
Yah… It actually is